I'm drowning. These sleepless nights and the never ending nightmare during the day, its consuming me. It's been half a year without you. I thought I was doing fine but you're still the last person I think of before I sleep and the first person I think of when I wake up whether I like it or not. I remember your face so vividly it drives me insane. The look on your face when you're fast asleep, your lips, your breath, your smell. When there's something funny, something important or anything at all, you'd pop right into my head first because I'd still wanna tell you everything. Maybe this is just part of a first heartbreak but anyone could be better but no one makes me laugh the way you do. I could be weird with you and feel completely normal but with others i'm just awkward and lame. Funny how your snores were so comforting and your laughter just makes me so so happy. I miss watching you eat, cooking for you, random weird dancing times, long bus rides that made me wish it'd last forever, quoting TV shows, watching you study ever so seriously and just being in your arms, all wrapped in your embrace. I still wear your clothes to sleep I dont even know why. Everything else is packed away, to think that having them being out of sight would mean that they were out of my mind..so wrong. Some days it gets easier but some days just get worst. Maybe today's just one of the worst days.
Maybe it'll get better.